What do you do when you go from Squeaky clean Disney, to genie rubbing strumpet to a chaps wearing cage fighter to a candyman harassing air hostess to a colossal fail comeback album.
Obviously you go on about rebirth and again take your clothes off and look almost godlike on an album and hope your army of gay following will love you again and remember why they loved you in the first place.
Here’s the harsh slap, the sitting of the down and telling you that as much as mummy and daddy love you, they want you to stop listening to Christina’s new album.
Photoshop can only do so much, with this record, it’s not even so much present to whats going on in the world, with lines like “If a smile can erase a frown” it made me forget the girl who made Dirty acceptable, and mourn her.
This is more Autobiographical than she wants to let you believe, her now wailing voice, yes, wailing, this is beyond singing, this is wailing, we’re past Mariah style now, she’s on a whole new level. She’s invited dance hooks and auto-tune to a record that is soul less and questionable in why it was created.
Okay, negativity out the way, on the positives: She looks 23 on the cover, that was a push for me to find something good about something that has no place in being produced.
Back to the reason why I’m forcing myself to listen to this, that which is labelled music, I’ll put my hands up, I own her first album, enjoyed her second, dealt with the third, there was signs of life of a talented song writer or at least someone was. but when you sing about bisexuality and being going clubbing and then say how happily married you are, you can’t try to reclaim the title of being the ‘it’ girl, who passes out at a party and questions her life in song, nope, sorry, I’m not buying it.
Lets show examples of this, what happens when a singer is sad, she writes a song, she breaks down emotionally, shaves her head to avoid her kids being taken, what happens when Christina’s sad, she Wails, actually feel like she’s trying to deafen me with her voice about scars, then prominently asks that me and you sit and swivel on her middle finger, keeping it classy there Christina, you kiss you mother that potty mouth?
Things I liked: The fact i’ve now created a new drinking game out of this album is the only redeeming feature. Every time she wails I drink! Doing more damage than good Christina.
But it’s got me through your album.
The album on a whole doesn’t sit well, like she’s shotgunning at other peoples music and then asking us to Shut the fuck up and then again Swivel on her middle finger Shut up and Circles are the songs I’m referencing, which doesn’t sit well and again on shut up she replaces “naughty words” for orgasm sounds and then asks us to shut up? No, Madame, No.
Tune in to: Light up the Sky, it’s only redeeming feature, where her wailing is overlooked by actual singing, when she stops wailing.
Skip: Every other song, Sing to me started off promising but then again I was blown away by the wailing.